I know that as a parent you want to do what is right for your children.
I know firsthand the precarious sensitivity involved in raising a teen who is ‘wired differently’ in a world wired for ‘normal’.
- You might still be exploring a diagnosis of Autism or ADHD for your teen or get your head around your teen’s diagnosis and what this means for you and your family.
- Your teen might have recently come out to you as lesbian, gay, bisexual, asexual, non-binary, or transgender or they may be questioning their sexuality and/or gender and you are not sure how to handle this with understanding and sensitivity.
- You may be navigating how to do the best for your teen while navigating ‘the system’ (school, medical and mental health), differing parenting styles with a partner, spouse or co-parent and while trying to shield your teen from other people’s beliefs and judgments.
- You may be struggling with how to manage your teen’s behaviour so that they don’t hurt themselves or others.
- You may be struggling to support your teen with their anxiety, depression, panic attacks, melt-downs, shut-downs and suicidal thoughts.
- This is all while you struggle with your own emotions, grief and neurodiversity along with juggling the rest of ‘life’.
It can feel overwhelming and relentless!
We all know that when our children are not doing well we are not doing well either.
I know that you and your teen may have been dismissed and that their challenges may have been blamed on bad parenting. (Even though we both know that you are doing the very best that you can for your child).
You are not alone!
The heartbreaking reality is that Neurodivergent teens (by no fault of their own) are more likely to be affected by mental health challenges, dysregulated behaviours, school refusal, co-occurring medical conditions, low employment rates, discrimination and bullying. The consequence of this is higher suicide rates and low life expectancy rates.
It is worrying, I know.
Evidence suggests that Neurodiverse people, particularly Autistics, are 8 times more likely to be gender diverse and have a lesbian, gay, bisexual, queer, or asexual sexual orientation, compared to neurotypical people (National LGBT Health Education Center). This alongside the alarming, disproportionally high rates of depression, anxiety and suicide in Neurodivergent people and those who belong to the LGBTQ+ community, helps us to capture the picture of how challenging it is for them to be both Neurodivergent and Queer individuals in society, as this can place them in a double minority!
In a recent article published by the University of Cambridge, Elizabeth Weir, a PhD candidate at the Autism Research Centre in Cambridge, and the lead researcher of their study, said, “Understanding the intersectional identities of autistic individuals who are asexual, bisexual, homosexual, or ‘other’ sexuality is key. Healthcare providers and educators must use language that is affirming and accepting of all sexual orientations and gender identities.”
Parenting your teens in today’s modern times can feel really daunting, especially since there is so much prejudice and misinformation out there.
Traditional parenting strategies don’t work for our complex teens! We need a different set of tools in order for our children to thrive.
Seen Heard Accepted Parenting Allyship Program is focused on Four Things:
- Secure Attachment with a Parent or Significant Adult.
- Accepting and Affirming your Teen’s Neurodivergent and LGBTQ+ identities.
- Connection before Correction, Problem-Solving or Advice Giving.
- Adapting your Parenting Approach to your Teen’s Needs, Strengths and Difficulties.
Research has found that a parenting approach that focuses on mutual respect, trust, acceptance and connection can be a powerful protective factor for our children.
Connection-Focused Parenting – a trauma-informed approach based on modern neuroscience is proven to de-escalate dysregulated behaviours and have long-term mental health benefits.
When we feel better we do so much better!
I’ve been where you are and I can help.
In all my years, I have come to learn this one thing – in order for our Neurodiverse and or LGBTQ+ Teens to safely thrive being themselves in this world, we as parents need to equip ourselves and our teens with the necessary skills to navigate in a world wired for ‘normal’.
Our children are born sovereign and whole and I believe they need our protection, guardianship and allyship to safely thrive being themselves in this world!
We all desperately want to honour our children and ensure they are safe and yet the neurotypical and heterosexual bias that informs the majority of society creates a lens where their very existence can prompt comments, situations and danger that needs to be recognized and responded to with skill.
As a supportive loving parent, I know how vital it is to equip yourself and your teen with the understanding and knowledge so that they can feel safe being who they are and take up the space they were born to fill.
I specialise in supporting parents who are seeking help in the following areas:
- Guidance, insight, understanding and Neurodivergent and LGBTQ+ Affirming parenting tools and strategies to support your teen with their behaviour, anxiety, panic attacks, melt-downs, shut-downs and autistic burn-out – which will have huge ongoing benefits for their (and your) mental health.
- Support with how to respond to your teen’s ‘coming out’ in terms of sexuality and gender with understanding and sensitivity.
- Assistance as to how you can adapt your parenting approach to meet the needs, strengths and difficulties of your child.
- Support with how to get on the same page with a co-parent, and set boundaries with friends and extended family members when it comes to unsolicited comments or advice about your children.
- Guidance with how to navigate the school and mental health systems.
- Guidance for how to make time for and prioritise yourself as the full-time carer of a teenager with complex needs.
- A safe place to share your questions about your teenager’s and/or your neurodiversity, your thoughts, emotions and grief.
- Support with creating a plan for yourself and your family going forward.
Let me give you the empathy, time, guidance and practical skills that you need so that you can feel confident and sturdy in your parenting. Together we will work to empower you with grounded confidence in your abilities so you will know how to respond and reply to each scenario, in a way that feels good to you and your teen.
My 1:1 Parent Coaching provides the privacy, support and personalized response to support both you as a parent and your teen/s
Book your complimentary 30-minute Parent Allyship Connection Call with me to get started.
What you can expect from our 1-1 Coaching Allyship:
- Confidential, personalized support for you and your family.
- Empathy, understanding and guidance for you and your parenting journey from a parenting coach with decades of professional experience supporting children and families and lived personal experience with her own Neurodivergent and LGBTQ+ Teens.
- Evidence-based, practical tools that will equip you with an empowering skill set that will leave you feeling confident in your parenting no matter the scenario.
- Let me show you how to equip your teen with emotional coping skills and the resilience essential for leading a successful life.
How it works:
6 x 60-minute Zoom Sessions (weekly or bi-weekly)
Coaching Package – $175 x 6 payments (speak to me about a payment plan to suit your family circumstances if you are in New Zealand you may be able to use your MOE funding for a portion your payments.)