Tanya Valentin - 5 Stages of Spiritual Awakening

Spiritual Awakenings can be amazingly transformative experiences. They can be the conduit for joy, purpose, greater understanding and creativity. However, they can also be lonely, messy, confusing, depressing, overwhelming and trauma-filled.

“This is terrible,” a friend said to me recently. “I feel emotional all the time!” “I feel as if there is something more that I should be doing with my life, but I don’t know what!” “I just don’t know what to do, I wish I could just take medication to take all of this away!”

If you would like to read more about what a spiritual awakening is and whether you are having one read my blog – Is It A Midlife Crisis Or A Spiritual Awakening?

The Lonely Path

She wouldn’t be alone. So many women as they navigate from Maidenhood to Motherhood to Midlife go through this rite of passage. Throughout our lives, we are in a constant life-death-life cycle. Mid-life is a potent time of letting go and rebirth as a woman transitions from her Maiden/Mother years and reawakens her Wild Woman (the truest, fiercest, most authentic version of herself).

Girls crystallise their most authentic sense of self sometime between ages of 8 and 10. After that… puberty arrives and girls can often start to feel the pressure of the female gender role. ‘Puberty requires girls to swap blue jeans for a skirt and independence for the female role’… the process can reverse as menopause, when women have an opportunity to reconnect with the inner girl and reclaim their lost sense of self.”

Lara Briden – Hormone Repair Manual

As we age archetypes such as the Huntress, the Lover, the Wise Woman and the Queen are activated in us and call to be healed and embodied as we birth a new version of ourselves into existence.

This can be an overwhelming, lonely, confusing and terrifying experience for a woman who has spent most of her life living in the Maiden or Mother roles. The women in our ancestral line lived in communities where these life-death-life cycles were witnessed and celebrated. An awakening woman in these communities would have had the support of other women from her tribe as they cooked meals together, created handcrafts and sat around the communal hearth sharing rituals and stories.

However, this is no longer the case. In our western culture, we often only make space for the Maiden and the Mother archetypes. Our Wise, Wild selves are rejected and ostracised. Many women feel these powerful energies swirling around in them but have no one to speak to, no one who will listen.

You may feel as if you are going crazy as if there is something fundamentally wrong or broken in you.

But, you are not alone and you are not broken.

Like the miraculous butterfly, you are simply in the process of a magical transformation.

The Awakening Stages

As a Midlife Mentor for Women I support Soul-Led, Midlife Women who are on an awakening journey, to unlearn the beliefs, behaviours and stories that no longer serve them at this stage of their lives.

I help you to reconnect with and love the woman behind the roles, the responsibilities and the weight of the expectations of others. Live the next half of your life in a way feels true to who you authentically are as the Queen of your own life! 

Curious to find out more about Archetypes? Buy My Book When She Wakes She Will Move Mountains – 5 Steps to Reconnecting With Your Wild Authentic Inner Queen.

Below are the 5 Stages of Awakening as described in my book.

When She Wakes She Will Move Mountains by Tanya Valentin

Read my blog on Archetypes

The Foothills

This is the beginning of the journey (sometimes called the Caterpillar stage). During this stage, you will start to hear the whispers of your Wild Woman Archetype waking up inside you. This activation usually follows a trauma. This can be (but is not limited to) the death of a loved one, a chronic illness, the end of a relationship, a pandemic or the shift in consciousness due to a change in life stage (such as midlife). The pain of staying the same becomes so uncomfortable that you start to question your thoughts, beliefs and agreements.

This is where you begin to awaken to the fact that you are ready for something more. When you are at The Foothills of the journey it is common to feel alive, excited and/or confused, emotional and stuck.

The Cave

The Cave (sometimes call the Cocoon stage) is the descent into the “Special World” where you activate and come face to face with your Wild Woman archetype.

This transformative place is where you discover the healing power of solitude. The Cave is often dark, lonely and uncomfortable, as your Wild Woman – your shadow teacher, helps you to strip back the layers of your cultural programming and other people’s expectations. With the shedding of each layer, you start to see your true self more and more clearly.

The Cave is where you are also reconnected with your Wise Woman archetype. The Wise Woman helps you to integrate your stories and learn their lessons. The Wise Woman balances out her sometimes erratic Wild Woman sister as she gifts you the regeneration of your intuition.

The Boulder Choke

As you journey through The Cave you will come up against areas where you will encounter obstacles and resistance. This could be from forces inside you or outside you. These are areas where you need to excavate and mine for the treasure that is YOU. What was unknown or hidden from you is now brought into the light.

A Boulder Choke is an opportunity for you to meet the shadows of your most dominant feminine archetypes, and test your lessons, and your newly reawakened intuition. Your thoughts and emotions are all scrambled during this stage and it can feel futile at times. During the process of perimenopause and menopause, your DNA is literally rewiring itself and knitting itself back together in a new way. This takes time and patience so allow yourself to surrender to the journey. The Bolder Choke is where you learn to trust yourself again. We also start activating the self-love and self-nurturing of the Mother and the Lover archetypes.

The Return to The Ordinary World.

As you leave The Cave you are met by your Huntress archetype. The Huntress archetype represents your focus and your independence. It is through the sheer determination of the Huntress that you find the inner strength to ascend the mountain so that you can take your rightful place as the Queen of your life. This is the stage of the Butterfly and a beautiful and liberating stage of the journey. But it can also be overwhelming and confusing as you rediscover who you are. Your priorities may change as you decide what is important to you and what you want to invite into your life.

The Return to The Ordinary World is a time of recalibration. You may find that your relationships change as people in your life are introduced to the ‘new you‘.

We need the Huntress archetype’s strength during this stage of our spiritual awakening. It is through her drive for personal freedom that we learn to stand on our own two feet, make our own decisions, find our voice and start to take responsibility for our own lives.

The Empowered Queen.

This is where at the top of the mountain, we step into our power and sovereignty (dominion of who we truly are). The Queen represents mastery. When a woman steps into her Queen is no longer waits to be saved by someone else. Nor does she wait for something outside of her to change in order to have the life that she truly wants. The Queen recognises that she can choose herself, for herself. She gives herself permission to be her own hero. She knows her own worth and accepts and loves herself. The Queen invests in herself and gathers a team of advisors and like-minded Queens around her. She lives her life with intention, purpose and a desire to be of service to others.

Who is Your True Self That You Are Waking Up To Be?

A Spiritual Awakening can be a painful, uncomfortable process. However, it is also an exciting freeing time in a woman’s life as we get to meet the person we were truly meant to be and opens the door to discover what we were meant to do. Many women after their Awakening find a new sense of purpose in their lives, change careers or even go back to school to study. Some women embrace travel and go on adventures, start new fulfilling hobbies and or start or become part of new communities of people.

To find your stage of Spiritual Awakening take my FREE Quiz

She is still there. The person you were before you became a mum, a wife, a partner. That person still matters.

We do not become healers. We came as healers. We are. Some of us are still catching up to what we are.

We do not become storytellers. We came as carriers of the stories we and our ancestors actually lived. We are. Some of us are still catching up to what we are.

We do not become artists. We came as artists. We are. Some of us are still catching up to what we are.

We do not become writers.. dancers.. musicians.. helpers.. peacemakers. We came as such. We are. Some of us are still catching up to what we are.

We do not learn to love in this sense. We came as Love. We are Love. Some of us are still catching up to who we truly are.

Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes

Over to You

Are you on an Awakening Journey?

What has the experience been for you?

What stage are you in your awakening?

Please leave me a comment or take my short survey here.


As a Midlife Mentor for Women I support Soul-Led, Midlife Women who are on an awakening journey, to reconnect with, love and trust the woman behind the roles, the responsibilities and the weight of the expectations of others.

I help you to unlearn the beliefs, behaviours and stories that no longer serve you so that you can live the next half of your life in a way feels true to who you authentically are as the Queen of your own life! 

Would you like some encouragement and guidance along your awakening journey? Buy My Book When She Wakes She Will Move Mountains – 5 Steps to Reconnecting With Your Wild Authentic Inner Queen.

When She Wakes She Will Move Mountains by Tanya Valentin

Tanya

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