The Connected Parent Blog

Welcome to The Connected Parent Blog.

In The Connected Parent Blog, I share my parenting journey as a Neurodivergent Mum of Teens who are Neurodivergent and part of the LGBTQ+ community from my perspective. I also share the Connection-Focused Parenting tools and strategies with you that have worked for me, my family and countless other families.

As self-discovery, reparenting ourselves and reconnecting with who we are as people first beyond the role of parent are all part of the journey, you will notice themes of this throughout my work. (This blog is written from my lived experience as a parent and a teacher, supported by the amazing research of professionals and advocates in this field. I am not a therapist or medical professional)

I have always believed that in order for our Neurodivergent children (and ourselves) to thrive in this world we do not change the person, but instead, the environment they live in needs to change. I am committed to spreading hope, practical, heart-led tools and advocating for change for my children and yours.

Please feel free to connect with me, share your perspectives and experiences and comment on blogs that you found useful.  If you enjoy what you are reading and feel that it could help a friend or family member then please share these resources with others.

Don’t ever forget that a small group of thoughtful people can change the world, it’s the only thing that ever has  – Aaron Sorkin.

Let’s work together to shift the paradigm of neurodiversity, sexuality and gender so that our children (and we) can safely thrive in this world as themselves.

T x

The Importance of Seeing Your Child as ‘Good Inside’

Connection-focused parenting is based on the assumption that we are all fundamentally ‘good inside’. In other words, you are a good person and your child is a good kid.

This might sound deceptively simple. Of course, our kids, and we as parents are good inside. But stay with me here. It is easy to hold onto our idea of goodness when everything is going ‘right’, when we are calm and regulated or when our children are behaving as we believe that they ‘should’.

However, when our child has just had a meltdown, we argue with our partner about how to handle a parenting situation, or we are exhausted, overwhelmed and ‘over it’ it is very easy to see the worst in ourselves, our partner or our child. It is very easy to believe that we are ‘bad’ inside. Read how you can change this and use the principle of ‘good inside’ as a powerful parenting tool. Read more…

What Is Connection-Focused Parenting And Why It Is Important For Your Neurodivergent Teen

I am a parent of three neurodivergent teenagers and so I know that parenting teens can be tough. For many parents, the turbulent uncharted territory of the teenage years can feel like a minefield. Your amiable, loving kid who just yesterday, couldn’t bear to be apart from you pulls away from you and starts locking themselves in their room.

Suddenly your teen’s friends’ opinions supplant yours as the most important. At times it may seem as if they can’t stand you, they don’t want you around and are literally counting the days until they finish school and can leave home to live their own life away from you.

This is all part and parcel of a normal stage in your child’s growth and development. However, it can feel overwhelmingly confusing, hard and quite frankly, horrible. Read more…

The Valentins

Shifting The Paradigm Of Neurodiversity

Autism and ADHD are something that affects approximately 15-20% of the population. The increased diagnosis of Autism and ADHD in teens and adults highlights the need for there to be more conversations that facilitate the shifting of the paradigm on how we speak about, perceive and include neurodiversity.

In this blog I highlight some of the key challenges for neurodivergent individuals and their families. I explore why we need to advocate for shifting the paradigm of neurodiversity. Read more…


Even ‘Good Parents’ Grieve Their Parenting Journey Sometimes

All parents experience parental grief as part of their parenting journey.

There are two types of parental grief. There is the irreconcilable grief that comes from the death of a child that no parent ever truly recovers from. (If this is you I hold nothing but love and respect in my heart for your loss).

And then there is the more nuanced grief that comes from the loss of our identities, ideas and expectations of what parenthood would be like.

There is nothing in the world like it – this heartbreakingly beautiful experience of life and death – becoming and surrender that we as parents go through every day. Read more…

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